Stephen Kahn

Little Peep does not think this is very funny

In Hard to tell, Humor, Uncategorized on September 8, 2011 at 6:27 pm

Last night when I got home from the monthly meeting of Transition Whidbey. I asked my wife if poor limping Little Peep had managed to jump up to the perch again after my wife put the chickens to bed.

My wife replied, “I think Little Peep is dying. I put her in the cage and put her in the basement.”

This morning, my wife asked me to check on Little Peep to see if she is still alive. She was alive, but sitting very still in her cage. I put her up on a platform we have for the pullets in the chicken run, and put some shade over her cage. The other chickens gathered around her and clucked in sympathy, or confusion. After she dies, we will put her out next to the garden where a hawk, eagle, owl, crow, coyote, or raccoon can scavenge her body.

I am still healthy, though I have a few aches and pains these days, and my heart is beating a little too slowly, so I may need a pacemaker implanted one of these days just to get my pulse with the program. The local newspaper runs obituaries, usually written by survivors, and often speaking admiringly of their religious faith (for the believers), or being evasive about their beliefs (or lack thereof), in the case of the agnostics and atheists.

I am writing my own obituary with instructions to my heirs to send it to the newspaper. There is a cost involved, so if the Great Depression #2 continues, my heirs may decide not to spend the money. My instructions are to have me cremated, though it would be fine with me if they tossed me in the woods where the hawks, eagles, owls, crows, coyotes, or raccoons can scavenge my body. However, I think the health department looks askance on such a practice,  and as much as the tea party rails against government bureaucracy, I doubt they will adopt my desire to have my body disposed of as inexpensively and simply as possible as a cause.

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  1. I wouldn’t take it on as a political cause, but I support “green” burials—no embalming, no vaults, casket made of wood, not metal, etc. Tim and I both plan to be buried this way. I won’t go as far as leaving a body out for the scavengers, though! 😉

  2. You can ship your body down here for Little Liu to eat. By that time, I won’t be able to afford weasel food anyway. Win-win.

  3. Cameryn, my wife, who always wants to do correct the thing wouldn’t mind a green burial, but would be embarrassed by a scavenger burial, so my ghost would think yes, dear.

    I would be honored to be Little Liu food.

    Little Peep made it through the day. She is the most carnivorous of the flock. It’s hard to find enough bugs to be entertaining, but I brought her some sod, and grass and especially delicious weeds. She dragged herself over to the goodies and pecked happily at them for hours. I felt as if I had done a good deed, and if I had a high quality cam I could have filmed a documentary for the pet channel that would have been the kick off for a series entitled Helping your pet Die Happy or some such.

    A few months ago I was involved in a project with a gentleman who hid from me the fact that he was dying. For various reasons too complicated and while not shameful or embarrassing, it’s not appropriate to explain the whole matter, but the circumstances created some misunderstanding and distress on my part. I was told that he had built a coffin for himself during the time he knew he was dying.

    In a recent conversation sorting it all out, someone said to me, “I am not a believer in an afterlife, but I was with X when he died, which came a little suddenly and before he or anyone expected. I don’t know exactly what it was, but I had a powerful experience that he had died in such an atmosphere of love in a place where he had lived for a long time in a marvellous relationship that something wonderful and mystical had happened.”

    I acknowledged I was listening, but refrained from any comments.

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